5 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Start a Business

1. What problem am I solving?

Answer this: My product will solve ___________________. If you can’t answer that, stop there and go back to the drawing board. It’s important that your product solve some sort of need because that’s what determines the value.

The book Rework likens entrepreneurship to having an itch and then scratching it. The "itch" is your problem; the scratch is your solution. Kids losing their self-esteem after hair loss through chemotherapy was my particular itch. Headbands of Hope, which provides headbands to kids during treatment, is my scratch.

When you think of solving a problem, you usuallly think of functionality. For example: a coffee mug that keeps your coffee hotter longer. Or luggage that compresses to take up less space. However, a need can also be something less obvious and still have value. For example: The app Offline Media tells you what’s going on in your city, if you live in North Carolina. The need it's filling is getting people "offline" and outside.

2. What funds do I absolutely need to start?

Maybe your dream is to open up a storefront to sell your handmade chocolates. However, that’s a lot of money you'll need up-front to open a store, especially if you haven’t tested the concept. Instead, do whatever you can do in the beginning to use as little in funds as possible to grow organically.

Sell your chocolates at farmers markets, or online if you can. When I started my company, I only had a very limited number of styles for people to choose from. Once I sold those, I used the profits to expand my collection.

Think about what you absolutely need to buy in order to start, not what you’d ideally like to have in the bank. Your number to get started might be smaller than you think. 

3. Who else is doing this?

You can’t play the game if you don’t know the players. Do a simple Google test to see who else is out there doing what you're doing. Just because someone else is out there selling chocolates doesn’t mean you can’t sell chocolates, too. However, you need to see what the competition looks like in order to decide if you can offer something better.

4. What’s my ‘special sauce’?

Speaking of differentiating yourself from the competition, determine what your "special sauce" is. According to Shark Tank's Mark Cuban, your special sauce is a quality about your company that stands out from the rest. For example, my headband company donates a headband to a child with cancer for every headband we sell. Our charitable donation is our special sauce because it differentiates us from other headband companies.

Your own special sauce can come from a lot of different areas of your company: where it’s made, the unique quality of the product, how it’s made, competitive pricing, a charitable component or your stellar customer service.

For example, Lawson Hammock's product differs from other hammock companies' because it has a built-in tent on top.

Ask yourself, "What is going to make someone purchase my product over my competitors'?" Your answer is your special sauce and should always be included in your marketing.

5. What resources do I currently have to get started?

Remember in Cast Away when Tom Hanks' character opened all the floating packages and repurposed them for survival? That’s exactly the mentality you need to have when you’re an entrepreneur.

I hear too many people tell me what they don’t have. I’d rather hear what you do have access to and how you plan to utilize it. I started my company when I was in college. Even though I didn’t have any money or experience, I focused on what I did have: professors (closest thing to industry experts) and access to numbers (students).

I worked with different professors to help develop a business plan and create a product and website and everything else I needed to get started. Once I was ready to go, students were my first customers.

So, make a list of everything you have that can help you: people you know, finances, skills and anything else. You’ll be surprised how resourceful you can be even when you feel limited.

Another question I hear people ask themselves before they start a business is, “Is this the right time?” I’m going to save you from asking yourself that because there will never be a time that feels totally right.

But I will tell you that when you want something badly enough, you make time for it no matter what. Starting a business isn’t about the stars aligning and your feeling 100 percent confident. Starting a business is about your passions and excitement outweighing your fears and doubts. 

These questions might not give you a clear answer, but when you catch yourself constantly going back to the same idea when you lay your head down on your pillow each night, you know you’re on to something you're passionate about. Sometimes, that’s the only answer you need.

7 Character Traits That the Best Employees Share

The difference between success and failure in business usually comes down to one thing:  good teamwork. If someone is going to be an employee, he or she needs to work well with me and other team members. For that reason, it's important to identify and hire based on the qualities that predict teamwork and success. 

Here are seven qualities that the best employees have in common.

1. Reliability

Your employees are only as good as they are reliable. But, how do you determine how reliable new hires will be before you work with them? The value of credentials has all but vanished in today’s economy, so you have to look elsewhere.

Quite frankly, I don’t care where someone has worked or what his or her GPA was in college (or even if he or she went to college). What matters to me is what this person has done. Has he stayed at the same job for years? Or, did she have three jobs in the last year? Was he successful at what he did? Why did she leave?

I couldn't care less about the text of someone's CV and more about former employers and coworkers have to say. I will spend hours on the phone speaking with a potential new employee’s references before extending a job offer. Tip: Ask former employers what the potential employee's attendance was like, to get a feel for what you yourself might experience.

A committed employee will be a more reliable employee, so be sure to get a sense of the candidate's passion for the position and the field.

2. Confidence

A confident person is more likely to speak up when things go wrong, even if he or she looks stupid doing so. Too often, employees look at someone else to speak up first. Seek out people with the confidence to express their opinions and create a culture that fosters open disagreements. A confident employee will not only find it easy to initiate conversations and act independently but will also exude confidence to clients and peers.

We work better with people we trust, and we trust people who are confident in their beliefs and abilities, whatever their job role may be.

3. Image

Appearance matters in the workplace. Regardless of how attractive someone may appear, well-dressed employees give a better impression of themselves and their company than people with disheveled clothes and unkempt hair. It's important that employees dress to fit your company's image. I’m not suggesting that everyone look alike, only that you uphold some standard of professionalism based on your industry’s standards and common practice. 

4. Experience

Experience trumps all. When hiring new employees, look closely at their background and past work experience. But, even more important, ask specific questions about their experience. Ask questions that require detailed knowledge about the industry to figure out how exactly what they know.

What did they learn? What challenges did they face? How did they overcome them?

Listen closely to their answers and notice how comfortable they are when speaking about their experience. Do they respond with generic industry tropes or speak specifically, using data and numbers? This will give you a good idea of whether they can truly walk the walk.

5. Easy to work with

Gone are the days of isolated programming and engineering jobs. Today, the best employees in any field are those who work well with others. “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you,”  Dale Carnegie wisely said.

Whether they'll be interacting only with colleagues in the office or clients, hire employees who work well with others. Better yet, hire people who are great with other people. Look for someone with a positive outlook, someone who smiles and someone who looks you in the eye. Pay attention to small talk.

Employees should be able to hold a polite and sensible conversation with colleagues and clients. If they can’t, it’s unlikely that they’ll capture or keep business. On the other hand, keep an eye out for constant complainers. Ask what they didn't like about past positions.

Are candidates' responses polite yet honest, or are they a license to vent? Their answers will tell you how they’ll speak about your company when they leave. Everyone has things that they don't like about a job. However, the best employees maintain a sense of tact and keep these complaints to themselves, especially during an interview.

6. Detail-orientated

“Detail oriented” has become somewhat of a standard buzzword filler for candidates and job postings. But it’s still important.

A strong attention to detail is a key indicator of success in business. This is especially true if the employee works in a technical or number-crunching role. Detail-orientated employees are more likely to double check their work and proof-read before labeling something as "complete.”

7. Emotional intelligence

Academic intelligence is not the only form of intelligence. True intelligence is a lot more than a piece of paper from a college. True intelligence comes from experience. Experiences in the real world give us a sense of “street smarts,” or what’s formally called emotional intelligence.

There are a number of interview questions that can gauge someone’s level of emotional intelligence. Ask a combination of problem solving questions and logic questions. You may be surprised by a candidate's creative answers.

Conclusion

Finding a good employee is hard work. I spend upwards of 100 hours per hire. That’s a lot of time, but it’s essential to hiring the right people. If you know what you're looking for, it can make the process a lot easier. Prioritize the characteristics that matter most in your business. Come up with interview questions that will screen for employees who have those traits.

06 Tips for Creating a Sexy Logo

1. Be clear on the core values you want your logo to convey. 

Mine are be real, be brave and have fun.

These values must be reflected throughout your branding, not just your logo. Your values help you make business decisions that align with your purpose, and attract people and opportunities that are right for you.

If you haven’t uncovered yours yet, put this on your immediate to-do list.

2. Identify between five and 10 keywords that represent what you do.

Mine are heart-brain, truth, orgasmically joyful, co-active coaching and light. 3. Look for symbols that align with your keywords and values.

My logo is composed of a heart inside a flame.

For me, the heart represents heart-brain, which holds your truth and light. When you connect with the truth and light inside your heart and actively put it out there, you experience true joy. This orgasmic joyfulness energizes and fuels you, which is represented by the flame.

How these symbols are brought together visually reflects my values of real (light and truth), brave (original image that stands out) and fun (a vibrant illustration rather than a corporate look).

4. Hire someone who really gets your brand to design your logo.

Don’t just look for someone who has done great work. If the person doesn’t truly get your brand, no matter how creative they are, they won’t pick up on the subtleties that truly capture what you want to express.

Ensure the person or agency you hire is open to feedback and creating visuals that are truly reflective of you, rather than insisting on doing their version of how they feel the brand should be. Trust your inner voice. It knows, better than anyone (even the experts), what you truly want to put out there. 

5. Test how the logo will look on your branding materials.

Test how the logo will look on your website and marketing materials before putting the time and effort into the final draft of your logo. Sometimes you love something on its own, but when put on your website it doesn't balance well with the rest of your content. 6. Ensure the end result feels right.

I can’t emphasize this point enough. Don’t settle for what someone created if it isn’t truly you. This is your logo; your brand. You need to feel it in every cell of your body.

Try the “light” method. Do you feel light when looking at the logo? If you feel any heaviness, something isn’t right. If you feel light, you’re on the right path. Trust that feeling. That’s your intuition telling you when something is or isn’t right for you.

I truly believe that to create successful a life and business that brings you joy, you need to align all elements of your business with your core values and purpose. It’s how I created a six-figure business that I’m excited to wake up to each day, and it’s how many of my clients are now doing the same for themselves.

10 Research-Proven Tricks to Seem Smarter Than You Are

It’s great to be smart, but intelligence is a hard thing to pin down. In many cases, how smart people think you are is just as important as how smart you actually are.

“I not only use all the brains that I have, but all that I can borrow.” –Woodrow Wilson

As it turns out, intelligence only explains about 20 percent of how you do in life; much of the other 80 percent comes down to emotional intelligence (EQ). EQ is a skill that’s so important that 90 percent of top performers in the workplace have high EQs and people with high EQs make $28,000 more annually than those with low EQs.

The hallmark of emotional intelligence is self-awareness, which involves not just knowing how you are but also how other people perceive you. People with high emotional intelligence are masters of influence -- they’re skilled at altering their behavior to make the most of a given situation.

You might not be able to alter your genetics, but there are some proven strategies that can help you appear to be smarter. Some of these strategies seem arbitrary, but research shows they make a massive difference. That makes this good information to have, especially when you need to sway someone to your way of thinking. 

1. Use a middle initial. 

John F. Kennedy. Franklin D. Roosevelt. It turns out there might be a reason that so many people who hold a prominent place in history used a middle initial. Not only does using a middle initial enhance your perceived social status, it also boosts expectations of intelligence capacity and performance. In one study, participants were asked to read and rate Einstein’s essay on the theory of relativity, with authorship being attributed to either David Clark, David F. Clark, David F. P. Clark, or David F. P. R. Clark. Not only did David F. Clark get higher ratings than David Clark, David F. P. R. Clark outdid them all. In another study, participants were asked to choose team members. For academic competitions, people who used middle initials were selected more frequently than those who didn’t. (It was quite a different story for athletic competitions.) So, if you want a quick perceived IQ boost, start using that middle initial.

2. Make graphs. 

Research conducted at Cornell suggests that people are more likely to trust a source if it contains graphs. In one of the Cornell studies, participants read a document on the effectiveness of a new cold medication. One report contained a graph; the other didn’t. Other than that, they were exactly the same. Still, 96 percent of the participants who read the report with a graph believed the claims, while only 67 percent of those who read the document without a graph thought the same. So, next time you create a document, stick in a graph. It doesn’t have to be complex; it just has to be accurate.

3. Skip that drink. 

And that’s not just because people tend to do stupid things when they’ve been drinking. A joint study conducted by the University of Michigan and the University of Pennsylvania revealed that merely seeing someone hold a drink is enough to make them seem less intelligent. It’s not that we assume less intelligent people are more likely to drink; it’s that the perceived correlation between drinking and cognitive impairment is so strong that we assume impairment even if there isn’t any. For example, although job candidates frequently think that ordering a glass of wine over a dinner interview will make them appear intelligent and worldly, it actually makes them come across as less intelligent and less hirable. There’s even a name for it: the “imbibing idiot bias.”

4. Believe in yourself. 

Nothing projects intelligence quite like confidence. When you believe in yourself, it shows, and research shows that believing in yourself improves your performance on cognitive tasks. Self-doubt, on the other hand, impairs your performance. What’s worse is that other people pick up on this doubt, which makes you appear less intelligent to them. If you want people to believe in you, you have to believe in yourself.

5. Write simply. 

If you’re really smart, you shouldn’t have to use big words to broadcast it. True intelligence speaks for itself, so you don’t have to show off your impressive vocabulary. In addition, you always run the chance of being wrong. Using a big word incorrectly makes you look, well, not so smart. So, if you want to appear more intelligent, stop studying the dictionary and just focus on communicating effectively.

Related: 8 Great Tricks for Reading People's Body Language

6. Speak expressively. 

Communication expert Leonard Mlodinow makes the case that even if two people say exactly the same thing, the one who says it most expressively will be perceived as being smarter. "If two speakers utter exactly the same words, but one speaks a little faster and louder and with fewer pauses and greater variation in volume, that speaker will be judged to be more energetic, knowledgeable, and intelligent,” Mlodinow said. If you want to come across as more intelligent, modulate your speech by varying your pitch, volume, speed, and energy level.

7. Look ’em in the eye. 

We know we’re supposed to do this anyway -- it’s good manners, right? That’s true, but it also makes you look smarter. In a study conducted at Loyola University, participants who intentionally managed their eye contact scored significantly higher on perceived intelligence.

8. Wear nerd glasses. 

Did your mom ever tell you to be nice to the nerds, because you’ll probably be working for them someday? As usual, mom was onto something. Research shows that people wearing glasses—especially thick, full-framed ones—are perceived as being more intelligent. So, if you want to seem smarter (when you’re giving a presentation, perhaps?), leave the contacts at home and wear your glasses.

9. Keep pace with the crowd. 

I mean this one literally. I know it may sound silly, but research conducted at Boston University shows that it’s true. It’s called the “timescale bias,” and it refers to our tendency to attribute greater intelligence -- based on mental attributes like consciousness, awareness, and intention -- to people who do things at about the same speed as everyone else. If you want to look smarter, you need to stop dawdling, but you also need to stop scurrying around like some crazed robot.

10. Dress for success. 

This one should be no surprise. Extensive research shows that how you dress affects how people see you. Dressing well makes you seem more intelligent, and showing skin makes you seem less intelligent, as it directs people’s attention to your body rather than to your mind. But did you know that how you dress also affects your performance? A recent study by Northwestern University found that making people wear lab coats improved their performance in tasks that required intelligence and concentration. 

Bringing It All Together

Intelligence (IQ) is fixed at an early age. You might not be able to change your IQ, but you can definitely alter the way people perceive you. When it comes to succeeding in the real world, perception is half the battle.

14 Tips to Put Your Business Blog in the Spotlight

Blogging is no longer an online diary. It’s big business, and your most effective marketing tool. The best blogs command the same respect as the oldest print newspapers, and some of the world’s largest, most successful companies treat their blogs as key parts of their online marketing strategies.

Want a slice of the pie?

It’s not easy -- nothing worthwhile ever is. By playing to your strengths as an expert in your field, you can use your blog as a powerful marketing tool to generate quality leads, create strong relationships with potential customers and build your reputation within your chosen industry.

Here are 14 key tips to give you the best possible chance of success.

1. Know your customers

No topic will be interesting to everyone. Focus your efforts on the people who matter to your business -- existing and potential customers.

Who are they? What are they interested in? What kind of questions do your customers frequently ask, and what search terms might they use when seeking an answer to a problem? 

The general public probably won’t care about what you write, but the people you deal with on a regular basis will -- so make sure you tailor your content to their needs and preferences.

2. Do your research

Take a look at what your competitors are doing, and pay extra attention if they seem to be doing it well. What are they writing about, how often are they doing it and how are they presenting their work?

Every business checks up on the products or services their rivals are offering, so there’s nothing shady about taking a look and drawing inspiration from their blogs to make improvements to your own.

3. Be human

A blog is not a press release, a letter to the bank, a financial statement, an awkward discussion with a potential father-in-law; it’s a personal and informal message from you to your customers. So be yourself -- the human, not the business. Sit back, relax and let your own personality out in your writing.

You’ll have a better chance of building relationships with your readers if you come across as the person behind the business, rather than the business itself.

4. Be accessible and show you care

Ensure readers can comment and provide feedback on what you write, and engage with respondents whenever you can. Remember: your blog should be a discussion, not a one-sided lecture.

A comment shows the reader cares about what you’ve written. Replying to a comment takes no time at all, and every reader will appreciate that you’ve gone out of your way to listen to and respond to what they have said.

Engaging someone in a two-sided conversation forms a connection between you and them -- and it could be the start of the most profitable business relationship you’ll ever have.

5. Produce regular content

You’ll have the best chance of striking up a relationship with regular readers, but you won’t build a regular readership unless you provide them with a steady stream of fresh content.

Organize your ideas and plan in advance what you’re going to be publishing, and when. It’s up to you how often you update your blog, but if you start off writing a new post once or twice a week, make sure you stick, more or less, to that frequency. 

An up-to-date blog tells potential customers you’re committed and very much in business; an abandoned or sporadically updated one does the opposite.

6. Ensure your blog looks good on all platforms

The last five years have seen an explosion in the use of mobile devices to access online content. Where once a business could focus on Windows-based desktop users and large screens, they must now also cater to visitors on small-screen tablets and smartphones.

Choose a responsive blog layout. It will adapt to the device being used by the reader and ensure your blog is easy to view for all visitors -- whatever they are using to access it.

7. Keep it simple

Unless you provide a very specialized service aimed only at professionals, avoid industry jargon and use easily understandable, clear language in your blog.

Never use a long, complex word when a short, simple one will do, and never say in 15 words what could be said in five.

8. Keep it scannable

Break up your text with plenty of white space. Text walls can be intimidating or off-putting, so aim for no more than two -- three sentences per paragraph.

9. Don’t advertise

No one likes online ads. If a visitor stumbles upon your blog to find a 500-word puff piece extolling the virtues of a product or service you are selling, they’re not going to hang around.

Sales and new customers are the ultimate aim of the blog, but don’t force the issue. If a passing mention of something you do fits into what you’re writing, don’t go out of your way to avoid it -- but ensure your content, not your advertising, is what the reader notices.

10. Build up your network

Whatever market niche your business occupies, it’s not an isolated island bobbing around in the middle of the South Pacific. It’s part of a ready-made network.

There will be other businesses out there in related industries, writing their own blogs. They’re not direct competitors, but you probably have something in common -- a type of customer.

Expand your network by getting to know the authors on related blogs. Comment on their work, share it if you like it, maybe link to their blog in your own. There are no guarantees they’ll return the favor, but you’re far more likely to gain a recommendation and pick up some new readers from a blogger you know.

11. Allow easy sharing

Promoting a blog is hard work, even with the assistance of friends and family -- so enlist your readers to lend a hand. Allowing visitors to quickly and easily share an interesting blog post with friends on social networks such as Facebook and Twitter will significantly increase your potential reach.

Simple sharing icons can be added to any blog to allow readers to share it with a single click -- make sure they appear on every post you create.

The most effective position for sharing, according to research by CoSchedule, is everywhere. Prominence is more important than placement.

12. Write well

The informal nature of a blog gives you a bit of leeway regarding presentation, but it’s still important to ensure you avoid sloppy errors with your spelling and grammar.

It’s high school stuff, really -- ensure there are no excuses for readers to decide they’re going to take their business elsewhere. Poor writing could turn potential customers away, so always proof-read your work -- or better still, ask someone else to check it over. A second pair of eyes is more likely to spot a mistake than you are.

13. Publish useful content

It doesn’t matter how well you write, how nice your blog looks or how regularly you update it -- if you’re churning out posts that nobody wants to read, your blog will not be a success.

Again: think of who your customers are and aim to write content that will be useful and interesting to them. For example, consider some difficulties or problems your customers encounter, and use your expertise and knowledge to solve them. Your CRM is the data source of all the customer information you need, from complaints and FAQs to purchasing habits to social media accounts.

14. The right length

Deep analysis shows that longer content gets the most shares and backlinks. Does that mean you should strive to write epic posts every week? Absolutely not.

Keep most posts short, focused and informational. Plan an epic post, eBook, tutorial or research-based report a few times a year. If people appreciate and value your work, they’ll be more like to take a look at the rest of your website. Their opinion of you as a person will also rise, and someone who thinks highly of you is more likely to do business with you -- and that is, after all, the blog’s main goal.

Creating a successful and productive business blog is not easy, but following these tips should give you the best possible chance.

Tangible benefits may come instantly, but it’s more likely they will take time -- so stick with it, build your base of regular readers and keep producing quality content. It could be the best investment of time you ever make.

10 Things You Do That Make You Less Likeable

Too many people succumb to the mistaken belief that being likeable comes from natural, unteachable traits that belong only to a lucky few -- the good looking, the fiercely social and the incredibly talented. It’s easy to fall prey to this misconception. In reality, being likeable is under your control, and it’s a matter of emotional intelligence (EQ).

In a study conducted at UCLA, subjects rated over 500 descriptions of people based on their perceived significance to likeability. The top-rated descriptors had nothing to do with being gregarious, intelligent or attractive (innate characteristics). Instead, the top descriptors were sincerity, transparency and capable of understanding (another person).

These adjectives, and others like them, describe people who are skilled in the social side of emotional intelligence. TalentSmart research data from more than a million people shows that people who possess these skills aren’t just highly likeable; they outperform those who don’t by a large margin. Likeability is so powerful that it can completely alter your performance. A University of Massachusetts study found that managers were willing to accept an auditor’s argument with no supporting evidence if he or she was likeable, and Jack Zenger found that just 1 in 2,000 unlikeable leaders are considered effective.

I did some digging to uncover the key behaviors that hold people back when it comes to likeability. Make certain these behaviors don’t catch you by surprise.

1. Humble-bragging. We all know those people who like to brag about themselves behind the mask of self-deprecation. For example, the gal who makes fun of herself for being a nerd when she really wants to draw attention to the fact that she’s smart or the guy who makes fun of himself for having a strict diet when he really wants you to know how healthy and fit he is. While many people think that self-deprecation masks their bragging, everyone sees right through it. This makes the bragging all the more frustrating, because it isn’t just bragging; it’s also an attempt to deceive.

2. Being too serious. People gravitate toward those who are passionate. That said, it’s easy for passionate people to come across as too serious or uninterested, because they tend to get absorbed in their work. Likeable people balance their passion for their work with their ability to have fun. At work they are serious, yet friendly. They still get things done because they are socially effective in short amounts of time and they capitalize on valuable social moments. They focus on having meaningful interactions with their coworkers, remembering what people said to them yesterday or last week, which shows people that they are just as important to them as their work is.

3. Not asking enough questions. The biggest mistake people make in conversation is being so focused on what they’re going to say next or how what the other person is saying is going to affect them that they fail to hear what’s being said. The words come through loud and clear, but the meaning is lost. A simple way to avoid this is to ask a lot of questions. People like to know you’re listening, and something as simple as a clarification question shows that not only are you listening but that you also care about what they’re saying. You’ll be surprised how much respect and appreciation you gain just by asking questions. 

4. Emotional hijackings. My company provides 360° feedback assessments, and we come across far too many instances of people throwing things, screaming, making people cry and other telltale signs of an emotional hijacking. An emotional hijacking demonstrates low emotional intelligence. As soon as you show that level of instability, people will question whether or not you’re trustworthy and capable of keeping it together when it counts.

Exploding at anyone, regardless of how much they might “deserve it,” turns a huge amount of negative attention your way. You’ll be labeled as unstable, unapproachable and intimidating. Controlling your emotions keeps you in the driver’s seat. When you’re able to control your emotions around someone who wrongs you, they end up looking bad instead of you.

5. Whipping out your phone. Nothing turns someone off to you like a mid-conversation text message or even a quick glance at your phone. When you commit to a conversation, focus all of your energy on the conversation. You’ll find that conversations are more enjoyable and effective when you immerse yourself in them.

6. Name-dropping. It’s great to know important and interesting people, but using every conversation as an opportunity to name-drop is pretentious and silly. Just like humble-bragging, people see right through it. Instead of making you look interesting, it makes people feel as though you’re insecure and overly concerned with having them like you. It also cheapens what you have to offer. When you connect everything you know with who you know (instead of what you know or what you think), conversations lose their color.

People are averse to those who are desperate for attention. Simply being friendly and considerate is all you need to win people over. When you speak in a friendly, confident and concise manner, people are much more attentive and persuadable than if you try to show them that you’re important. People catch on to your attitude quickly and are more attracted to the right attitude than who you know.

7. Gossiping. People make themselves look terrible when they get carried away with gossiping. Wallowing in talk of other people’s misdeeds or misfortunes may end up hurting their feelings if the gossip ever finds its way to them, but gossiping is guaranteed to make you look negative and spiteful every time.

8. Having a closed mind. If you want to be likeable, you must be open-minded, which makes you approachable and interesting to others. No one wants to have a conversation with someone who has already formed an opinion and is unwilling to listen. Having an open mind is crucial in the workplace, where approachability means access to new ideas and help. To eliminate preconceived notions and judgment, you need to see the world through other people’s eyes. This doesn’t require that you believe what they believe or condone their behavior; it simply means that you quit passing judgment long enough to truly understand what makes them tick. 

9. Sharing too much, too early. While getting to know people requires a healthy amount of sharing, sharing too much about yourself right off the bat comes across wrong. Be careful to avoid sharing personal problems and confessions too quickly. Likeable people let the other person guide them as to when it’s the right time for them to open up. Over-sharing comes across as self-obsessed and insensitive to the balance of the conversation. Think of it this way: if you’re getting into the nitty gritty of your life without learning about the other person first, you’re sending the message that you see them as nothing more than a sounding board for your problems.

10. Sharing too much on social media. Studies have shown that people who over-share on social media do so because they crave acceptance, but the Pew Research Center has revealed that this over-sharing works against them by making people dislike them. Sharing on social media can be an important mode of expression, but it needs to be done thoughtfully and with some self-control. Letting everyone know what you ate for breakfast, lunch, and dinner along with how many times you walked your dog today will do much more harm than good when it comes to likeability.

5 Signs You're Much Smarter Than Average

1. You’re anxious. It’s hard to think of anxiety as a good thing, but evidence suggests that it might not be all bad. Psychiatrist Jeremy Coplan studied patients with anxiety disorders and found that the people with the worst symptoms had higher IQ scores than those with milder symptoms. Other studies have found higher verbal IQ scores in people with higher levels of anxiety. And then there was a more complex experiment conducted at the Interdisciplinary Center Herzliya in Israel. Researchers asked participants to evaluate artwork presented by a software program and then triggered a fake computer virus, making it look as if it was the result of something that the participant did. They then sent the participants on an urgent mission to get tech support, only to throw yet another series of obstacles in their way. They found that the most anxious participants were also the most focused and effective at executing tasks. The next time somebody tells you to stop worrying so much, just tell them it’s your oversized intellect getting in the way.

2. You were an early reader. A British study of 2,000 pairs of identical twins found that, despite their identical genes, the children who started reading earlier had higher IQ scores (both verbal and nonverbal) than their siblings. On the surface, this one seems easy enough to explain away: the kids who learned to read early did so because they were smarter. But that wasn’t the case. The researchers concluded that learning to read early actually had a developmental impact -- it made the kids smarter. So, if you were an early reader, it might not be because you’re smart. It may be that you’re smart because you were an early reader. 

3. You’re left-handed. It turns out that all of those teachers who tried to force lefties to write with their right hands may have had it backward. While there is a small and, as of yet, unexplained correlation between being left-handed and being a criminal, there are some intellectual benefits to being a southpaw. One large study demonstrated that left-handedness is associated with divergent thinking, all the more so in males. This unique ability to combine two unrelated objects in a meaningful way is a sign of intelligence.

4. You took music lessons as a kid. There are a number of studies demonstrating that musical training enhances verbal intelligence and executive function, a skill that’s critical to focus and self-control. In a study conducted by psychologist Sylvain Moreno, 48 children between the ages of four and six participated in a computerized training program that was led by a teacher. For one hour per day, five days a week for four weeks, half the students completed a musical program and the other half completed a visual arts program. At the end of the experiment, 90% of the children who received the musical training showed improvements in verbal IQ. So, if you took music lessons when you were a kid, that’s a good sign. 

5. You’re funny. Class clowns rejoice! Research shows a strong connection between being funny and having high scores in both verbal intelligence and abstract reasoning. It appears that your witty banter is the product of a sharp mind. Now, you just need to come up with a joke about that.

07 Security Tips That Seem Paranoid But All Smart People Do

1. Pull the microphone cord

Zuckerberg also had tape over the MacBook's microphone jack in the photo, but I've heard of people going to much greater lengths. In a conference room, they pull any microphone cords connected to anything (particularly a laptop or a videoconferencing system). It's a radical move, but you never know--an audio connection might already be compromised and recording conversations.

2. Never use public Wi-Fi

I've heard of entrepreneurs who never use public wireless--ever. Even if the signal is password protected (which is not the case in places like Starbucks and most hotel lobbys), they don't trust the fact that hackers could be sniffing out a single and stealing data. My advice is to use a hotspot on your phone instead. Hotspots can be password protected easily, and the signal is much harder to sniff. Wireless carriers add extra security and the signal is constantly jumping between towers.

3. Avoid all online banking

It's so easy to check your account from a phone these days, and many of the apps require strong passwords. Yet, there is a danger. For one, even if you use a strong password, it might be something people can guess--your son's name followed by your anniversary date and a question mark, who knew? Hackers have shown an ability to run password generators in a few seconds. A better but much less convenient approach? Do all banking from a trusted connection or even at the bank itself.

4. Shield your screen

You can barely even find them for sale anymore, but a privacy screen is a good precaution, albeit a little annoying. 3M still makes them. You cover your screen so that no one can see what you're doing from a side angle. It's an interesting practice and one I've seen in San Francisco more than my local coffee-shop here in Minneapolis for sure. Instead of a privacy screen, you can also sit in an area where you know it's impossible for anyone to see your screen, like a back corner.

5. Take your laptop to the bathroom

OK, this one seems weird. Yet, when I work at coffee-shops, I never leave my laptop unattended even for a short time. There's a risk of theft, although I work in a sleepy town with low-crime. My bigger concern is someone jumping on my laptop and looking through my email. Anyone who works in a public place will always take their laptop with them everywhere, even for a few minutes.

6. Always power down your phone when not in use

A phone that is turned off is much more difficult to hack. It's also a good battery saving measure, although it's also really inconvenient. One reason it protects you is that it can be easy to disable wireless networks and Bluetooth, but a phone that's off is not emitting a signal--despite what you see in Jason Bourne movies. Also, it ensures that someone who wants to hack into your phone will have to type your passcode to gain access when it powers up. (You do use a passcode, right?)

7. Download then delete all email

It's excessive, I'll admit it. But one last step is to always download your email and delete the messages off the server. This means your messages will be stored locally and nowhere else, which means a crash can destroy your only archive. Yet, if you are concerned at all about someone stealing your email, it's the only way to go. From what I can tell from the photo, Zuckerberg uses the Mac version of Thunderbird, which is a desktop client. He probably doesn't use cloud email.

10 Timeless Habits That Will Change Your Life Right Now

1. Choose to Live in Peace

This means peace with others, your current situation, and the path you're on.

My path was a vision, then a business concept, trial and error, investor pitches, trial and error, a startup launch, advice from mentors and sages, and an internal compass that said this is the path, even if it meant Raisin Bran and Top Ramen for dinner.

Choosing peace allows you to stick to the plan, even when the skeptics say you're crazy. Peace blocks distractions that try to derail you from the plan.

Peace means minding your own business, not comparing yourself with others, and being grateful every day for the place you find yourself.

2. Trust the Process

The trust I speak of is counterintuitive for type-A entrepreneurs like me. It means having to surrender. Sound weak? Think again.

Leadership thinker and author Mike Myatt brilliantly captured my thoughts about surrender in this article in Forbes, where he states:

"You'll rarely encounter the words leadership and surrender used together in complementary fashion. Society has labeled surrender as a sign of leadership weakness, when in fact, it can be among the greatest of leadership strengths. Let me be clear, I'm not encouraging giving in or giving up--I am suggesting you learn the ever so subtle art of letting go."

So surrender to the outcome, believe that things will work out according to your vision, and surround yourself with trusted advisers, friends, and family who will support you in your journey.

3. Live Happy

Another choice you must make every day. My wife and I have gone through the ringer financially getting two startups up and running, but we choose to not worry and be happy (thank you, Bobby McFerrin).

Kidding aside, the choice to be happy has long-term psychological benefits. Brain research by Dr. Wataru Sato of Kyoto University says that a person's happiness may depend on the size of a specific brain region called the precuneus. 

The study suggests that when you choose positive behaviors (like meditation), you hold the key to rewiring the precuneus. By changing your daily habits, you'll be able to control your sense of well-being, purpose, and happiness. Brilliant.

If you're caught in a vicious circle of doubt, fear, and uncertainty, replace those emotions by consciously and intentionally choosing happiness, joy, and hope.

Use the tools of meditation, prayer, journaling, and mindfulness to aid you in the process. Check in with close friends and family after two weeks and ask if they have noticed a difference. I would wager a small bet that they have.

4.  Choose to Have Great Relationships

I've learned to be picky over the years about whom I let into my inner circle of friends. Why? Because I believe close relationships are the key to sustaining your happiness and keeping you in great spirits.

But don't take my word for it. George Vaillant's profound longitudinal Grant Study over the course of 72 years proves this. He followed 268 men who entered college in the late 1930s through war, career, marriage and divorce, parenthood and grandparenthood, and old age.

When asked what he learned from his massive research, his response?

"That the only thing that really matters in life are your relationships to other people."

His colleague Robert Waldinger, a psychiatrist and now director of the study, shared the lessons learned about how to build a fulfilling, long life in his popular TED Talk--now reaching close to 10 million views. 5. Choose to Give

The late Jim Rohn said,

"Only by giving are you able to receive more than you already have."

Countercultural, yes, but I have a whole bookshelf dedicated to this success practice.

In the book The Go-Giver, the main character Joe learns that changing his focus from getting to giving--putting others' interests first and consistently adding value to their lives--ultimately leads to unexpected returns.

Science also says giving makes us feel happy, is good for our health, and evokes gratitude.

Giving isn't restricted to money. Give of your time, mentor others, volunteer at a shelter, support a cause, sponsor a child, fight injustice, and have a pay-it-forward mindset.

6. Choose Compassion and Kindness

I'll never forget how kindness was extended to me from the most unlikely of sources: a homeless man.

When I lived near the beach in Southern California, I often rode a bike on the strip between Santa Monica and Venice.

On one afternoon, a homeless man walked right in front of me, and I flipped over the handle bars and crashed hard against the pavement, scraping my knees and elbows. I lit into him, threw some f-bombs his way, and rode off fuming.

Less than 20 minutes later, my bike's chain came undone. I'm not the mechanical type to just fix it on a whim. Worse off, it was a rental, the bike shop was miles away, and closing time was approaching.

The next thing I knew, a shirtless homeless man with a leathery tan approached me and offered to fix it. I've never been that humbled. Ever. He had me back on the road and in time to return the bike before the rental shop closed.

This act of compassion from someone with nothing but a pair of dirty hands shook me to my core. I realized how far I still had to go in extending kindness to others, especially to the "least of these."

Compassion as a business value

Companies out to make a difference in the world understand the power of this value. Listen to Google's own "Jolly Good Fellow," Chade-Meng Tan, explain in this TED Talk how Google expresses compassion in everyday business.

 

7. Choose to Have Faith

I don't speak of religion, which has been abusive to so many. I speak of a faith--whatever your belief system--that comes from a deep spiritual connection with a  power greater than yours. A power that extends you grace, forgiveness, love.

It's this faith that strengthens you and makes you endure your trials. A faith that helps you realize it's no longer about you.

8. Fight the Good Fight

I started this article talking about a divorce. Perhaps your story is 10 times worse--death in the family, bankruptcy, substance abuse. But don't quit. To live in awesomeness doesn't always mean a walk in the park. There will be trials through which you'll need to persevere.

So fight the good fight, keep your eye on the prize (what's the big picture?), and stay honest and transparent with your inner circle--the people who should have your back through the cycles of your life. You will feel awesome in the process.

9. Make Decisions in Full Integrity

I wrote an article about integrity being the most important leadership trait. Allow me to quote myself (a first):

"Living, working, and leading in integrity means that we don't question ourselves. When we listen to our hearts and do the right thing, life becomes simple, and we live in peace. Our actions are now open for everyone to see, and we don't have to worry about hiding anything."

Living the awesome life is knowing that your conscience is clear, your heart is whole and open for inspection, and your reputation is on solid ground.

10. Listen Selflessly

The first to state his case wins, right? Not so fast. I've seen many self-appointed "prosecutors" hastily argue for or against something until a more prudent person cross-examines and questions that person.

The talk around the water cooler the next morning is about how "talking without all the facts just made him look silly."

Living in awesomeness means knowing when to speak (or being slow to speak) and when to listen.

The best listeners, as I've written before, have uncanny ability to first listen intuitively to the other person's story before a rebuttal. Therefore, the response is never reactionary.

They listen by searching conversations for depth, meaning, and understanding with the other person's needs in mind. They listen with one modus operandi: How can I help the other person?

As you consider the choice to live an awesome life, which of these resonate with you? Let me know in the comments, and subscribe below for more articles such as these.

09 Habits of People Who Never Settle for Mediocrity

1. Pack your schedule.

Most people waste a LOT of time, usually 60 - 100 hours every week, because they have too much down time and are not busy enough.

Make a schedule. Schedule every 30 minutes and fill it to the brim with stuff; this can be stuff that makes you excited, it can be work, it can be sleep, it can be watching a movie, it can be learning to play an instrument, etc.

Just pack it full so that you are the one in control of your time and so that you learn what you are capable of.

2. Do things no one else is willing to do.

When someone says it can't be done, or that it is impossible, you should be the first one in line to test it out.

Test it, see if it actually is impossible, and then make it work out somehow. Become the person everyone goes to if they want something handled that is too hard.

That will make you way above average through the skills you learn in handling difficult problems, never giving up, and through realizing that your potential is far greater than you believe.

3. Learn more than anyone else.

Not just by studying in school, but especially about yourself, how to improve yourself, and how to master all the areas of your life.

Study every single day. Learn at least for an hour a day by watching videos or reading, and you will be way more knowledgeable than the average person, which gives you more control over your life.

4. Read between 2 and 4 books a month.

That's at least 1 every two weeks, maybe even 1 a week.

Most people finish 4 books in a year; if you can do 6 - 12 times that amount, that means you will be 6 - 12 times ahead of everyone else, ahead of the average person.

5. Quit the TV and video game addiction.

If I meet you in 10 years at the airport and ask you what you have done in the last 10 years, would you rather say, "Oh ... I just watched a lot of shows and movies, and played a lot of games ... nothing much."

Or would you want to say, "I worked really hard on achieving my dreams, I became a master in every area of my life, I traveled the world, met amazing people, and finally got my dream job."

You are not choosing this life in 10 years. You are choosing this right now! Make the choice that the average person is too afraid to make and go for your dream.

6. Wake up earlier than everyone else.

If you can wake up early, it shows that you are in control of your life.

Most mistakes, regrets, and bad decisions are made after 10 PM. Go to bed early so you can wake up early and make better decisions, which lead to a better life, which gets you out of "average."

7. Stop thinking of money as an evil thing.

"Money isn't everything", "Money doesn't make you happy", "Money corrupts". Those are all sayings of average people that never had any money.

How do they know? Sure, money isn't everything and it alone doesn't create happiness, but it sure as hell is not what corrupts people, and I bet I could be a lot happier being rich than poor.

Money is almost everything; with money we are free to do what we want, so stop thinking of it as this evil thing and actually make it your DUTY to have money!

You are obligated to take care of yourself, of your family, and to give yourself and them the best life imagineable, which means you need to have money. It is your duty.

Become the person that uses money for great things, good deeds, and who invests it in noble organizations. Be ethical and be rich at the same time, but be rich!

8. Never surrender on the things you truly want.

Most average people give up as soon as things get tough and then they complain that they never got what they wanted.

Of course things will get hard! You will cry, be frustrated, afraid, angry, and totally beaten to a pulp, but when the average person stops getting up, you have to rise once more.

What do you want?

What do you truly desire?

Whatever it is, however impossible it seems, never surrender, never give up on it, and never settle for anything less than that.

Get it, or die trying. That is the attitude of winners.

9. Be excited.

The average person is bored, upset, annoyed, or even all three. If you want to be above average, then force yourself to be ecstatic about life!

Even if you don't feel like it, just decide to be excited and enthusiastic.

Practice this and you will learn to be it every day, all day; it is a muscle, not just an emotion, so train it like one!

10 Ways to Make a Great First Impression

Say you meet a new potential customer, a potential employer, or anyone with whom you want to establish a business relationship.

Which matters more:

• Showing that you're skilled, experienced, and capable, or
• Showing that you're trustworthy and likable?

Many people assume that skill, expertise, experience, and competence matter most. After all, if you're going to hire me or do business with me, you need to know I have the talent to come through, right? It's natural to assume you should establish your credentials as quickly as possible.

Natural, but wrong.

According to Amy Cuddy, how people initially judge you has little to do with whether you seem skilled or competent. Instead, people subconsciously ask themselves one question when they first meet you:

"Can I trust you?"

According to Cuddy, trustworthiness (meaning warmth and likability) is everything. "From an evolutionary perspective," she writes in her book Presence, "it is more crucial to our survival to know whether a person deserves our trust." Her research shows that.

Of course natural likability can also quickly lose its impact, especially when there's no substance beneath the surface glow. That's where talent comes in: Once you've shown you're trustworthy, then you can prove you're talented.

In short, whip out your CV too soon and you may be wasting your time -- first you need to show that you're someone who can build and maintain great relationships, consistently influence (in a good way) the people around you, and make people feel better about themselves.

Those are the kind of people we all like to be around, and want to be more like.

So how do you do that? How do you come across as more likable and trustworthy -- in a genuine and authentic way?

1. Listen a lot more than you talk.

Ask questions. Maintain eye contact. Smile. Frown. Nod. Respond -- not so much verbally, but nonverbally. That's all it takes to show the other person he or she is important.

Then when you do speak, don't offer advice unless you're asked. Listening shows you care a lot more than offering advice does, because when you offer advice, in most cases, you make the conversation about you.

Don't believe me? Who is "Here's what I would do ..." about: you or the other person?

Only speak when you have something important to say -- and always define important as what matters to the other person, not to you.

2. Shift the spotlight to others.

No one receives enough praise. No one. So start by telling people what they did well.

Wait, you say you don't know what they did well? Shame on you -- it's your job to know. It's your job to find out ahead of time. Not only will people appreciate your praise, they'll appreciate the fact you care enough to pay attention to what they do.

And then they'll feel a little more accomplished and a lot more important, and they'll love you for making them feel that way.

3. Never practice selective hearing.

Some people -- I guarantee you know people like this -- are incapable of hearing anything said by someone they feel is somehow beneath them.

Sure, you speak to them, but that particular falling tree doesn't make a sound in the forest, because there's no one actually listening.

People who make a great first impression listen closely to everyone, and they make all of us, regardless of our position or social status or "level," feel like we have something in common with them.

Because we do. We're all human.

4. Put your stuff away.

Don't check your phone. Don't glance at your monitor. Don't focus on anything else, even for a moment.

You can never connect with others if you're busy connecting with your stuff, too.

Give the gift of your full attention. That's a gift few people give. That gift alone will make others want to be around you and remember you.

5. Give before you receive -- and assume you will never receive.

Never think about what you can get. Focus on what you can provide. Giving is the only way to establish a real connection and relationship.

Focus, even in part and even for a moment, on what you can get out of the other person, and you show that the only person who really matters is you.

6. Don't act self-important ...

The only people who are impressed by your stuffy, pretentious, self-important self are other stuffy, pretentious, self-important people.

The rest of us aren't impressed. We're irritated, put off, and uncomfortable.

And we hate when you walk in the room.

7. ... Because you realize other people are more important.

You already know what you know. You know your opinions. You know your perspectives and points of view.

All that isn't important because it's already yours. You can't learn anything from yourself.

But you don't know what other people know, and everyone, no matter who he or she is, knows things you don't know.

That makes other people a lot more important than you -- because you can learn from them.

8. Choose your words.

The words you use impact the attitude of others.

For example, you don't have to go to a meeting; you get to go meet with other people. You don't have to create a presentation for a new client; you get to share cool stuff with other people. You don't have to go to the gym; you get to work out and improve your health and fitness.

You don't have to interview job candidates; you get to select a great person to join your team.

We all want to associate with happy, enthusiastic, fulfilled people. The words you choose can help other people feel better about themselves -- and make you feel better about yourself, too.

9. Don't discuss the failings of others ...

Granted, we all like hearing a little gossip. We all like hearing a little dirt.

The problem is, we don't necessarily like -- and we definitely don't respect -- the people who dish that dirt.

Don't laugh at other people. When you do, the people around you wonder if you sometimes laugh at them.

10. ... But readily admit your own failings.

Incredibly successful people are often assumed to have charisma simply because they're successful. Their success seems to create a halo effect, almost like a glow.

The key word is seem.

You don't have to be incredibly successful to make a great first impression. Scratch the shiny surface, and many successful people have all the charisma of a rock.

But you do have to be incredibly genuine to be remarkably charismatic.

Be humble. Share your screwups. Admit your mistakes. Be the cautionary tale. And laugh at yourself.

While you should never laugh at other people, you should always laugh at yourself.

People won't laugh at you. People will laugh with you.

They'll like you better for it -- and they'll want to be around you a lot more.

09 Questions Emotionally Intelligent People Always Ask

9 Questions You Need To Ask

Daniel Goleman, the foremost authority on emotional intelligence, has put together these questions to help you evaluate your own emotional intelligence, and get you thinking about your strengths and limitations in EQ.

1. Are you usually aware of your feelings and why you feel that way?
2. Are you aware of your limitations, as well as your personal strengths, as a leader?
3. Can you manage your distressing emotions well -- e.g., recover quickly when you get upset or stressed?
4. Can you adapt smoothly to changing realities?
5. Do you keep your focus on your main goals, and know the steps it takes to get there?
6. Can you usually sense the feelings of the people you interact with and understand their way of seeing things?
7. Do you have a knack for persuasion and using your influence effectively?
8. Can you guide a negotiation to a satisfactory agreement, and help settle conflicts?
9. Do you work well on a team, or prefer to work on your own?

5 Signs You're an Outgoing Introvert

1. You find people to be both intriguing and exhausting.

"People watching? Yes. Meeting new people and hearing their life stories? Fascinating. Spending every weeknight hanging out with a different group of friends? Not a chance -- as much as you enjoy people, you can endure only so much socializing before you need downtime," writes Grannemann.

2. It actually takes less energy to say what's on your mind than to make small talk.

"Fake small talk bores you and drains your life force." (Here are some tips on avoiding another chat about the weather, if you're interested.) 

3. You're selectively social.

When it comes to friends, quality beats quantity for you. "It's hard to find people you click with, so you only have a few close friends. But you're OK with that."

4. You have no interest in trying to prove yourself in a crowd of strangers.

"'Working the room' isn't your thing. Nor do you feel the need to draw a lot of attention to yourself. You're content hanging out at the edges of the party, talking to just one or two people," explains Grannemann.

5. You're often confused for an extrovert.

"Your friends and family don't buy that you're an introvert because you're just so social. In fact, it may have taken a while for you to realize you're an introvert because you play the extrovert so well."

10 Things Every Working Dad Needs

Father's day is this Sunday where I live (Switzerland) and coming up June 19 in the US, so it's time to think about what our working Dads need. Remember this isn't necessarily a present guide (although some of these work great as gifts), but a list of what working Dads think make their own lives easier. I asked my readers for their suggestions and here is what the Dads say they need.

1. Audio Books.

If the Dad in your life has a commute, an audio book or an audio book subscription can make the commute a pleasant time instead of a stressful time. Unless your audio book is a thriller and then you just swap the kind of stress.

2. Wireless Speakers/Headphones.

When dad gets the opportunity to telecommute, wireless noise canceling headphones can drown out the noise of the little darlings, if they are home. (Remember, you need someone watching the little ones while you're working, even if you're working at home). If you can blast music throughout the house, a wireless speaker is the way to go. Several dads recommend Amazon's new Alexa, which allows you to easily tap into many streaming music services.

3. A smart thermostat.

Lots of Dads have a reputation for frugality. With a smart thermostat, Dad only pays to heat or cool the house when everyone arrives home from work or school. Some can even be activated by GPS-so as you're headed home, your system can turn the air conditioning on. Awesome.

4. A really awesome grill.

A Traeger Wood Fired Grill was the enthusiastic winner among the dads. Don't forget the remote thermometer so that you can check on your meat from the comfort of your air conditioned house.

5. A Yeti tumbler.

Brand matters here. Working Dad and Police Officer, Robert O'Callaghan, said, "My Yeti...Best cup ever. I own two and have bought 12 others as gifts. Did I tell you how much I love my Yeti? Almost as much as my guns." If you know Robert, you'd know that's a lot of love and a ringing endorsement.

6. Laundry service.

Even with business casual now the norm, most men's button down shirts still have to be ironed. If that's the case, there's nothing that makes life easier than a good laundry service that can return perfectly washed and ironed shirts. Saves Dad a ton of time in the mornings if he doesn't have to iron.

7. Instant PotThis came up with something every working mom needs as well-clearly it's a gender neutral necessity for any household. Dinner can go from frozen meat to on the table in 30 minutes. What Dad wouldn't love that?

8. A good ice pack or heat pack.

Dad still does a lot of physical things, even if he has a desk job. Whether's he's crouched over helping a kid learn to ride a bike, or crawling under a desk to reconnect printer cables, a good fix for those aches and pain is a necessity.

9. Manly baby gear.

Moms are still overwhelmingly the primary caregivers for babies, but dads do more and more, and they need stuff too. How about a diaper bag that reflects his style and personality? Or a stroller with long handles so that he doesn't hurt his back pushing it? Or a baby carrier that isn't all flowery, and is big enough for him to wear comfortably? Dads love and need this stuff.

10. A night out with mom.

Dads need some down time as well. And who do they want it with? Their wives. While some dads said they wanted a boys night out, most wanted time alone with their wives--a quality date night. So, find a reliable babysitter and get out of the house so Dad can unwind without the pressure of work or kids. A win for everyone.

10 Commandments for Launching a Successful Startup

1. Ensure that every member on your team can articulate your company's value proposition

What problems does your product or service solve for your customers, and why should they pick what you offer over your competition?

2. Recruit the best management possible

As Levy says, "Investors bet on the jockeys, not the horses they ride." Make sure your top-leadership team is talented and well equipped for every struggle that may arise.

3. "Fail" is not a four-letter word, but making the same mistake twice is unconscionable

Take risks but learn from your failures. There's no other way to improve in the world's dynamic landscape.

4. The stakeholder is always right

Listen to the people who have a stake in your business--from customers to employees to investors to your community--and make responding to their needs your top priority.

5. "First Mover Advantage" isn't all it's cracked up to be--learn from the mistakes of the early adopter

The early bird, as it turns out, does not always get the worm. Watch where the brave first pilgrim missteps--and learn.

6. Protect your intellectual property. Your IP is an irreplaceable asset.

For many startups, the intellectual property you create is extremely valuable. Do whatever you possibly can to protect it from disclosure.

7. If you think it can't be accomplished, you are correct

Our mindset can be a trap. If we think we can't do something, we probably won't. On the other hand, if we think we can accomplish anything we set our minds to, we very likely will.

8. Financials are like bikinis

Says Levy, "What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital." Be careful not to reveal too much--just enough.

9. Remember the words of George Bernard Shaw: "All progress depends on the unreasonable person"

Name one genius who isn't crazy--at least a little bit.

10. Don't believe your own bullsh-

Don't fool yourself into thinking you're better or smarter than you really are. It will only come back to bite you. Hard.

09 Signs That You're An Ambivert

Ambiverts have a distinct advantage over true introverts and extroverts. Because their personality doesn't lean too heavily in either direction, they have a much easier time adjusting their approach to people based on the situation. This enables them to connect more easily, and more deeply, with a wider variety of people.

Grant's research also disproved the powerful and widely held notion that the best-performing salespeople are extroverts. He found that ambiverts' greater social flexibility enabled them to outsell all other groups, moving 51 percent more product per hour than the average salesperson. Notice how sales increased as extroversion increased, peaking with those who were just moderately extroverted.explained the finding this way:

"Because they naturally engage in a flexible pattern of talking and listening, ambiverts are likely to express sufficient assertiveness and enthusiasm to persuade and close a sale, but are more inclined to listen to customers' interests and less vulnerable to appearing too excited or overconfident."

How Ambiversion Works in the Brain

How social you are is largely driven by dopamine, the brain's feel-good hormone. We all have different levels of dopamine-fueled stimulation in the neocortex (the area of the brain that is responsible for higher mental functions such as language and conscious thought). Those who naturally have high levels of stimulation tend to be introverts--they try and avoid any extra social stimulation that might make them feel anxious or overwhelmed. Those with low levels of stimulation tend to be extroverts. Under-stimulation leaves extroverts feeling bored, so they seek social stimulation to feel good.

Most people's levels of natural stimulation don't reach great extremes, though it does fluctuate. Sometimes you may feel the need to seek out stimulation, while other times, you may avoid it.

Finding Out Whether You're An Ambivert

It's important to pin down where you fall in the introversion/extroversion scale. By increasing your awareness of your type, you can develop a better sense of your tendencies and play to your strengths.

If you think that you might be an ambivert, but aren't certain, see how many of the following statements apply to you. If most of them apply, you're most likely an ambivert.

1. I can perform tasks alone or in a group. I don't have much preference either way.
2. Social settings don't make me uncomfortable, but I tire of being around people too much.
3. Being the center of attention is fun for me, but I don't like it to last.
4. Some people think I'm quiet, while others think I'm highly social.
5. I don't always need to be moving, but too much down time leaves me feeling bored.
6. I can get lost in my own thoughts just as easily as I can lose myself in a conversation.
7. Small talk doesn't make me uncomfortable, but it does get boring.
8. When it comes to trusting other people, sometimes I'm skeptical, and other times, I dive right in.
9. If I spend too much time alone, I get bored, yet too much time around other people leaves me feeling drained.

The trick to being an ambivert is knowing when to force yourself to lean toward one side of the spectrum when it isn't happening naturally. Ambiverts with low self-awareness struggle with this. For example, at a networking event, a self-aware ambivert will lean toward the extroverted side of the scale, even when it has been a long day and he or she has had enough of people. Mismatching your approach to the situation can be frustrating, ineffective, and demoralizing for ambiverts.

05 Reasons Your Best People Will Leave You

How Managers Blow It With Their Employees

Lets really zoom in on what the best leaders avoid doing to keep their best people from exiting, stage left. Here's what the research us saying.

1. Squashing the Talents and Strengths of Team Members

Not recognizing their unique strengths and talents beyond a job description, and how that translates to high performance, is certainly an engagement killer.

People love to use their unique talents and gifts. The best leaders will leverage close relationships with employees by finding out what their strengths are, and bringing out the best in their employees.

In fact, when managers help employees develop through their strengths and natural talents, they are more than twice as likely to engage their team members.

2. Not Communicating Enough

The second common mistake that leads to turnover is lack of communication. Employees whose managers hold regular meetings with them are almost three times as likely to be engaged as employees whose managers do not hold regular meetings with them.

But mere transactions between managers and employees are not enough. See, employees value communication from their manager not just about the job or task at hand, but also about what happens in their lives outside of work.

Studies are saying that employees who feel as though their manager is invested in them as people are more likely to be engaged. The key: be authentic.

3. Hoarding Information

The third mistake managers make that lead to turnover -- when this is done repeatedly, and intentionally -- is hoarding information.

Here's the real reason leaders hoard and withhold information: it's about power and control. And control is one of the most effective ways to kill trust.

The reverse of this is a leader who acts responsibly by sharing information and being transparent with his team.

Warren Bennis, in Transparency: Creating a Culture of Candor, cites a 2005 study finding that a group of 27 U.S. companies noted as "most transparent" beat the S&P 500 by 11.3 percent.

This takes the rarefied air of vulnerability -- a leadership game changer -- as I have written in the past.

4. Micro-managing

The fourth mistake that leads to turnover is a micro-managed environment. We all know what this looks like, so lets focus on how to avoid such a place.

First, ask yourself: am I putting the spotlight on my team members by focusing on their development? Do I truly value my people?

Secondly, are you giving your staff consistent feedback, and equally important, are you listening to feedback that will further support staff needs, and improve yourself (and your business, I might add) as a leader?

Lastly, are you letting them give input, express their creativity and allowing them to make decisions on their own?

 5. Failure to Listen

The fifth and last mistake that leads to turnover is when managers fail to listen. Sounds like a no brainer right? Well, I'm not talking about giving someone attention and nodding your head.

Let me put this into a business context. When a manager fails to listen to the collective voice of the team in pursuing a vision, chances are team members will not feel cared for, respected, or valued.

When a manager doesn't solicit the opinions of others, especially during change because change is often scary, trust begins to erode and morale goes in the tank.

So we're talking about a leader that has to stop getting the last word, a leader that allows for others to give input to important initiatives. And the only way to do that is to first listen receptively.

10 Ways to Make a Great First Impression

Say you meet someone new: a potential customer, a potential employer... or anyone with whom you want to establish a business relationship.

Which matters more:

• Showing that you're skilled, experienced, and capable, or
• Showing that you're trustworthy and likable?

Many people assume that skill, expertise, experience, and competence matter most. After all, if you're going to hire or do business with me, you need to know I have the talent to come through, right? It's natural to assume you should establish your credentials as quickly as possible.

Natural... but wrong.

According to Amy Cuddy, how people initially judge you has little to do with whether you seem skilled or competent. Instead, people subconsciously ask themselves one question when they first meet you:

"Can I trust you?"

According to Cuddy, trustworthiness (meaning warmth and likability) is everything. "From an evolutionary perspective," she writes in her book Presence, "it is more crucial to our survival to know whether a person deserves our trust." Her research shows that

Of course natural likability can also quickly lose its impact, especially when there's no substance beneath the surface glow. That's where talent comes in: once you've shown you're trustworthy, then you can prove you're talented.

In short, whip out your CV too soon and you may be wasting your time -- first you need to show that you're someone show can build and maintain great relationships, consistently influence (in a good way) the people around them, and make people feel better about themselves.

Those are the kind of people we all like to be around... and want to be more like.

So how do you do that? How do you come across as more likable and trustworthy -- in a genuine and authentic way?

Here we go:

1. Listen a lot more than you talk.

Ask questions. Maintain eye contact. Smile. Frown. Nod. Respond -- not so much verbally, but nonverbally. That's all it takes to show the other person he or she is important.

Then when you do speak, don't offer advice unless you're asked. Listening shows you care a lot more than offering advice does, because when you offer advice, in most cases, you make the conversation about you.

Don't believe me? Who is "Here's what I would do ..." about: you or the other person?

Only speak when you have something important to say -- and always define important as what matters to the other person, not to you.

2. Shift the spotlight to others.

No one receives enough praise. No one. So start by telling people what they did well.

Wait, you say you don't know what they did well? Shame on you -- it's your job to know. It's your job to find out ahead of time. Not only will people appreciate your praise, they'll appreciate the fact you care enough to pay attention to what they do.

And then they'll feel a little more accomplished and a lot more important, and they'll love you for making them feel that way.

3. Never practice selective hearing.

Some people -- I guarantee you know people like this -- are incapable of hearing anything said by someone they feel is somehow beneath them.

Sure, you speak to them, but that particular falling tree doesn't make a sound in the forest, because there's no one actually listening.

People who make a great first impression listen closely to everyone, and they make all of us, regardless of our position or social status or "level," feel like we have something in common with them.

Because we do. We're all human.

4. Put your stuff away.

Don't check your phone. Don't glance at your monitor. Don't focus on anything else, even for a moment.

You can never connect with others if you're busy connecting with your stuff, too.

Give the gift of your full attention. That's a gift few people give. That gift alone will make others want to be around you and remember you.

5. Give before you receive -- and assume you will never receive.

Never think about what you can get. Focus on what you can provide. Giving is the only way to establish a real connection and relationship.

Focus, even in part and even for a moment, on what you can get out of the other person, and you show that the only person who really matters is you.

6. Don't act self-important ...

The only people who are impressed by your stuffy, pretentious, self-important self are other stuffy, pretentious, self-important people.

The rest of us aren't impressed. We're irritated, put off, and uncomfortable.

And we hate when you walk in the room.

7. ... Because you realize other people are more important.

You already know what you know. You know your opinions. You know your perspectives and points of view.

All that isn't important because it's already yours. You can't learn anything from yourself.

But you don't know what other people know, and everyone, no matter who he or she is, knows things you don't know.

That makes other people a lot more important than you -- because you can learn from them.

8. Choose your words.

The words you use impact the attitude of others.

For example, you don't have to go to a meeting; you get to go meet with other people. You don't have to create a presentation for a new client; you get to share cool stuff with other people. You don't have to go to the gym; you get to work out and improve your health and fitness.

You don't have to interview job candidates; you get to select a great person to join your team.

We all want to associate with happy, enthusiastic, fulfilled people. The words you choose can help other people feel better about themselves -- and make you feel better about yourself, too.

9. Don't discuss the failings of others ...

Granted, we all like hearing a little gossip. We all like hearing a little dirt.

The problem is, we don't necessarily like -- and we definitely don't respect -- the people who dish that dirt.

Don't laugh at other people. When you do, the people around you wonder if you sometimes laugh at them.

10. ... But readily admit your own failings.

Incredibly successful people are often assumed to have charisma simply because they're successful. Their success seems to create a halo effect, almost like a glow.

The key word is seem.

You don't have to be incredibly successful to make a great first impression. Scratch the shiny surface, and many successful people have all the charisma of a rock.

But you do have to be incredibly genuine to be remarkably charismatic.

Be humble. Share your screwups. Admit your mistakes. Be the cautionary tale. And laugh at yourself.

While you should never laugh at other people, you should always laugh at yourself.

People won't laugh at you. People will laugh with you.

They'll like you better for it -- and they'll want to be around you a lot more.

10 Bad Habits That Are Killing Your Productivity

To find out, look for these ten toxic traits of perfectionism showing up in your actions:

1. Your goals or standards are too high.

They're so high, in fact, they are often unrealistic. If you can't be the very best, you sometimes give up.

2. You see any mistake as a failure.

If someone does something better than you, you feel that you've failed. You might also conceal your mistakes from others. There's some shame rooted in this that you will need to unpack.

3. You feel uncomfortable in your own skin.

This especially happens whenever you don't achieve your definition of perfection.

4. You don't like taking risks.

Because if you do, there is no guarantee you can do the task or solve a problem perfectly. So you end up sticking with safer tasks because you know you can get them done.

5. You are obsessed with results, results, results.

You don't enjoy the process of learning and working, trying new things, or considering other people's ideas. You only care about the result.

6. You often exhibit all-or-nothing thinking.

Basically, either something is perfect, or it's a failure.

7. You don't handle criticism and feedback well.

This comes from having an unhealthy attachment to others' opinions. You feel that if your flaws are exposed, others will reject you.

8. You apply your own unrealistic standards to those around you.

When others don't meet your expectations, you become critical of them. As a result, it may be hard to keep good relationships with people who will trust you.

9. You don't delegate.

Since you worry about other people not doing the task "as perfect" as you, you have a difficult time delegating away tasks to people who may actually be as competent as you.

10. You procrastinate.

By worrying about doing something imperfectly, you become immobilized and fail to do anything at all! This leads to more feelings of failure, and now you're caught in a vicious cycle.

The solution.

OK, reality check: Did you nod yes to some of the points above? If you did, don't be too concerned. I have good news -- if you're willing to make some positive changes.

1. Set realistic goals.

Come up with several long-term goals --one to five years -- and then break these down into yearly, quarterly, monthly, and even weekly goals. It can feel great to complete smaller goals along the path so it doesn't feel like you're staring up at Mt. Everest.

2. Listen to your emotions.

If you're feeling anxious, scared, or stressed about a decision, ask yourself whether you've set the bar too high. Your emotions may be telling you that you're trying to hit an unrealistic target, which may lead to self-sabotage.

3. Don't fear mistakes.

Look at your mistakes as a part of your evolution, which can provide tremendous learning experiences. But first, you need to have the courage to examine them; so learn from each mistake you make. You'll grow as a result. I love this quote from  Elbert Hubbard:

"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."

4. Readjust your personal rules.

Identify one rule you live by that's rigid, unfair, or unhelpful. Now reword it to be more helpful, flexible, and forgiving. What does your rule now state?

Your helpful, flexible and forgiving new rule: _____________________

5. Watch black-and-white thinking and words.

Be careful of using black-and-white thinking or verbalizing these thoughts; it will often lead to unrealistic expectations. Ask yourself, "Am I thinking in terms of extremes?"

Some examples are, "My team needs me. I must never make mistakes," or, "If we don't deliver on budget, the whole project will fail."